Ohhhh Alex. Alex is our most frustrating child. I mean that with all the motherly love in the world. Actually, he's whip-smart at school - he's an awesome reader, he's really good at math, and he's a computer whiz. So why can't he figure out anything else we tell him to do? I swear we are speaking a foreign language to him. I ask him to do little things, like - take this laundry basket to your room and fill it up with your dirty clothes. Ten minutes later I'll find him in the kitchen drinking a big glass of milk and eating a snack, with an empty laundry basket at his side. "Alex!" I say, "what are you supposed to be doing?" He'll stare at me blankly, "What?" "Remember....the laundry?" He'll think about it for a minute and then say, "Oh yeah!" and run off to his room without the basket. He does so many other things that just frustrate the crap out of me. He constantly loses his shoes and coat, and don't even bother making him look for anything. He'll wander the house aimlessly for an hour, "looking" for it, and then when you're really going to be late, you'll lift one thing up out of his closet, and - lo and behold - there's the missing item!
So last night we went to the Sizzler for dinner, and we were standing in line. I realized I had left my purse in the car. So Paul tells Alex, "Go to the car and get mom's purse - hurry!" As he ran off I chastised Paul for picking the worst child for that errand. "I'm testing him," Paul says, and I just shook my head wondering how badly this would turn out. Lots of time passed and we were almost to the cashier. So Paul tells Maddie to go get Alex. Maddie and Alex finally come in - no purse - what a surprise. I say to Alex, "Why didn't you get my purse?" "Oh, you wanted me to get your purse?" says Alex. "I thought you told me to get the carseat." WHHHHHAAAAAATTTT???!! How in the world did he get that out of - go get mom's purse?? So I say, "Well, even if you thought we wanted the carseat, why didn't you bring it to us?" "Because it was strapped in!" Duh, mom!
Oh Alex.
12 comments:
You are hysterical. Jenny and I always tease each other about having our own little retarded children. I swear Sage must have been dropped on her head at birth or something. Ha ha! I love your posts!!!
Sometimes it's fun to give him a task and see what will happen. "Go get me a spoon" and he'll come back two days later with an armadillo and some Cool Whip.
I think that might be the gene pool because Ike does that too! He'll be looking all over the house for something, I'll tell him right where to find it, he'll come back empty handed, I'll finally in a huff go look and it's right where I told him. Maybe it's a male thing? We'll see how Van and Oliver do.
I don't know if it's a male thing becuase Teylor is terrible! She is so absent minded it makes me crazy. I thought it was the Hilton ADHD gene, but maybe not.
It's your test to see how patient you can be Mand. I can handle Alex as a grandma - I hold his face (nicely) and have his repeat my request - and he does fine. As a mom I probably would have lost it.
Sorry Jen - Ike was not bad - I don't remember having to find things for him. Now Rand, he forgets that the item might be behind another one. (Grown man thing?)
Tey is too cute to be mad at.
Is he very perceptive and gets distracted by things he notices on the way? That's what this book I'm reading talks about.
I want to experiment with this at g'ma's house on Sunday.
That would drive me crazy too.
it a sign of creativity...I wonder where he gets it...Too bad you didn't know Paul at this age...
I want to know how many people are reading this blog and how many of those people think you should write a book!
hooray for links!
christine's isn't linked right - i was so confused.
Yeah, thanks. I realized that last night and fixed it.
I hear crickets chirping.
Holy crap I thought I was the only one with retarded children, my secret shame. Yesterday I told cayden, hurry and go get your shoes, they're downstairs! OK. he runs away. 10 minutes later he comes wandering back with...an armadillo and cool whip, well actually his carrot sword and ninja dagger. cayden where are your shoes? i don't know? go get them they are downstairs, hurry hurry! ok, runs downstairs. 10 minutes later..batman mask and rafael. cayden! go get your shoes! OK! ten minutes later...? where is he? outside in the sandbox, with no shoes. Good crap.
Even Hillary. Hillary don't forget to bring my phone when you come to the car, i left it upstairs. Hillary did you hear me? yes. Hillary comes to the car. Where is my phone? I don't know. I asked you to bring it downstairs! no you didn't. yes i did and you answered. I did not. sigh. i'll go get my phone special needs child wait here.
hahahaha! You make me laugh Lisa. I'm glad I'm not the only one.
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